Pick-&-Choose Cafeteria Catholics (#2)

I hope the readers of "Catholic Psychology Blogspot" realize the relevance of humor in the past two posts. However, we must agree we are discussing a very serious issue here. There were generations once referred to as "Baby Boomers". Then there was the "Love" generation. Some how what resulted from that was "Generation X", then finally "Generation Me"!

Let's examine ourselves carefully. In so many ways, and on so many levels, much of what we say and do can rotate solely around ourselves, and it is possible we won't even know it. This is a sobering thought if we will think about it in connection to our individual lives.

It is like this question I will now ask you. ... "Of all the creatures in the world, what is the one creature that does not know of the existence of water?" ... The answer to that question in many cases is the "fish". Often it is the "fish" that "does not know of the existence of water!" ... The reason many fish do not know of there is water, is because the fish is immersed in water constantly, thus fails to realize water exists!!!

This cannot be said regarding a "deer" for example. The deer definitely "knows" there is "water", and knows where to go get water when it needs it. When the deer is thirsty, the deer walks to the edge of a pond, bends down, then drinks from the pond which contains water. ... Being separat socially at times with the water, a deer has a profound consciousness of water! The deer realizes itself as a separate entity from water itself, and can thus go to water to drink it, or can choose not to on occasion.

This cannot be easily said for we humans in our relationship with selfishness. We people at this point of what has become a narcissistic generation. Truly "Generation Me".

In a highly technological age we are so surrounded, so immersed in selfishness in all fabrics of culture around us, that we can easily fail to see ourselves as self centered in what we do with our time, how we make our decisions, and how we honestly conduct ourselves in our personal relationships. Even doing something sacrificial for someone else, can interestingly turn out to be more for our own selfish desires, than than to be truly sacrificial for the interest of a person we say we are doing a thing for.

This is a psychological frame of mind, a process of thinking and feeling in relation to the world around us, that robs us of what we can do and be as Christians, thus Catholics, in service to our God who we say we truly believe in.

"And to the angel of the church of the Laodiceans write, 'These things says the Amen, the Faithful and True Witness, the Beginning of the creation of God: I know your works, that you are neither cold nor hot. I could wish you were cold or hot. So then because you are luke warm, and neither cold nor hot, I will vomit you out of My mouth. Because you say, 'I am rich, have become wealthy, and have need of nothing' - and do not know that you are wretched, miserable, poor, blind, and naked" ... "Behold, I stand at the door and knock. If anyone hears My voice and opens the door, I will come into him and dine with him, and he with Me." (Revelation 3:14-17, and 3:20)


Pick-&-Choose Cafeteria Catholics (#1)

Most of us, at one time or another, have enjoyed a meal in a cafeteria. Customers pass down the line of a great variety of foods, picking this or that according to their taste, and passing up other things they do not want. You might say it is a “pick and choose" kind of eating house.

It seems that some Catholics look upon their Church in the same way, that is, as regards the doctrines of the Catholic Church. They are sometimes referred to as “Cafeteria Catholics.” They feel they can “pick and choose” among the various doctrines and laws of the Church, some of which they accept, others they feel they are not obliged to obey. More and more today there are those who call themselves Catholic, who feel they can, and must, decide for themselves which of the teachings of the Church they will accept, and which they will not. How many, for example, do not accept the clear teaching of the Church in regard to such basic things as birth control, or premarital sex, or divorce and remarriage, etc. They look upon these teachings not as laws, but, at best, as ideals that they may not be able to live up to. Many things have changed in the Church, they say, since the second Vatican Council.

Yet, Cardinal Ratzinger, the Prefect of the Sacred Congregation for the Doctrine of the Faith (now Pope Benedict), stated clearly and emphatically in the book “The Cardinal Ratzinger Report,” that it is absolutely incorrect to refer to Pre-Vatican Council II and Post-Vatican Council II, as if there were changes in the Church’s position in matters of faith and morals. The only changes in that respect have sprung from erroneous interpretations of the Council.

As regards the “picking and choosing” of what teachings of the Church some will follow or not follow, Pope John Paul II stated in his talk to the Bishops in Los Angeles in 1987:

>“It is sometimes reported that a large number of Catholics today do not adhere to the teaching of the Catholic Church on a number of questions, notably sexual and conjugal morality, divorce and remarriage. Some are reported as not accepting the clear position on abortion. It has to be noted that there is a tendency on the part of some Catholics to be selective in their adherence to the Church’s moral teaching. It is sometimes claimed that dissent from the magisterium is totally compatible with being a “good Catholic,” and poses no obstacle to the reception of the Sacraments. This is a grave error that challenges the teaching of the Bishops in the United States and elsewhere.”

If we can believe the polls, we are experiencing in the Church at the present time a considerable amount of dissent from the teaching of the Church. ... (All of the above was written in an article by Father Paul A. Duffner, O.P., The Rosary Light & Life - Vol 46, No 4, Jul.-Aug. 1993 )


The Psychology Of Seeking Poverty

Let us not be fooled. ... There is a Christian Psychology, thus a Catholic Psychology. Among others, we see it in St. Francis of Assisi. His father was a wealthy merchant, but St. Francis chose to leave his life of wealth to pursue utter devotion to Christ in poverty. Before Catholic religious, he stripped himself of his clothing and took on a poor man's garb to symbolize his devotion.

The Catholic Church was in need of reformation. That reformation happened not by protesting reformers, but by people like St. Francis of Assisi, who stayed in the Church and created change from the inside as a servant.

He had a dream that God wanted him to repair His Church. St. Francis saw an old church building, and thought this was what God wanted him to repair. He did so, but then realized that perhaps God meant more than simply this.

Then St. Francis asked to see the Pope. Arriving at his door, the man at the door would not let him in, because St. Francis looked like a beggar from the street. The Pope finally let him in, then knew God would use St. Francis to do that very thing. The Roman Catholic reformation that St. Francis influenced has continued to this day.

We do not all need seek utter poverty as powerful ministries to our Lord. However, the principle remains true and has great application in our modern time.

Do you find yourself misrepresented in the things you do and say for others? Are you sometimes taken advantage of in ways that are truly not fair? Is your husband, wife or children sometimes cruel or impatient with ? Does your employer take advantage, or place someone of less skill in your place? God wishes that the spirit that was in St. Francis of Assisi, also be in us who follow Him in these times of persecution. Persecution, although sometimes mild, remain very real none the less, and painful.

Remember what St. Paul wrote under inspiration of the Holy Spirit:

"Therefore I take pleasure in infirmities, in reproaches, in needs, in persecutions, in distresses, for Christ's sake. For when I am weak, then I am strong." (II Corinthians 12:10)


How To Deal With Change

In a world where it is believed there is no "right or wrong", think about it, it can be psychologically satisfying to know you are moving in the correct direction. That "knowing" you are moving in the right direction is not always related to how you "feel", neither is it necessarily dependant on what you might "think".

Sometimes "thinking" gets in the way. You know, our "busy-ness" of thought. Even sometimes we must ignore what we feel, not because God doesn't care about our feelings, but because feelings at times cloud our judgment. In many decisions of life this can be dangerous.

"If any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask of God, who gives to all liberally and without reproach, and it will be given to him. But let him ask in faith, with no doubting, for he who doubts is like a wave of the sea driven and tossed by the wind. For let not that man suppose that he will receive anything from the Lord; he is a double-minded man, unstable in all his ways. Let the lowly brother glory in his exaltation, but the rich in his humiliation, because as a flower of the field he will pass away." (James 1:5-10)


Chastity Ring In British School (Rejected)

This is an update in the case of 16 year old "Lydia Playfoot" of England who has worn a small silver ring to school as a symbol of Christian purity. "The ‘Silver Ring Thing’ is a Christian education project aimed at helping teenage girls value themselves, make right choices about their futures, and reduce Britain's ever-increasing rise in sexually transmitted diseases and pregnancies amongst teenagers." (For the first post on this situation by "Catholic Psychology Blogspot", click on Silver Ring In High Court (Britain) .

Ms. Playfoot lost her case. Now she is considering if she should appeal. On Monday, July 16th, she said, "I am very disappointed by the decision this morning by the High Court not to allow me to wear my purity ring to school as an expression of my Christian faith not to have sex outside marriage.” ... “I believe that the judge’s decision will mean that slowly, over time, people such as school governors, employers, political organizations and others will be allowed to stop Christians from publicly expressing and practicing their faith.”

An article put out the next day by Reuters News Service stated: "Playfoot’s legal challenge was the latest in a series of disputes in British schools in recent years over the right of pupils to wear religious symbols or clothing, such as crucifixes and veils." ... "Playfoot’s parents are key members of the British arm of the American chastity campaign group the "Silver Ring Thing", a religious group which urges abstinence among young people. Those who sign up wear a ring on the third finger of the left hand. It is inscribed with “Thess. 4:3-4,” a reference to a Biblical passage from Thessalonians which reads: “God wants you to be holy, so you should keep clear of all sexual sin.”

"During the case, Playfoot’s lawyers argued that the ban by her school in Horsham, West Sussex, breached her human rights to 'freedom of thought, conscience and religion” which are protected by the European Convention on Human Rights.' "

It is interesting to me how during the interview recorded in the video above, the man and woman presenting the questions to Lydia and her father, would not dare pose a positively directed question or comment regarding teenagers who wish to remain chaste and save sex for marriage. The questioning was more like an "interogation", as if young Lydia Playfoot had some how "set fire to her school", or arrogantly "adorned herself in Nazi war clothing".
Regarding an adult who wrote in saying she "had been a Christian for 50 years, and never had need to use a ring to represent her Christianity." I wonder if this woman was ever married. If she had ever been married, being married would have included the Christian ritual and tradition to use a "RING" to "SYMBOLIZE" sexual devotion to her HUSBAND!!! I assure you at the beginning of the Christian Church, most citizens of Rome had virtually no concern for remaining chaste and devoting the sexual act to their spouses alone!
Hmmmmm, it's interesting how history appears to come around full circle. I believe if this interview had been with a young lady who had been promiscuous given birth to a child outside of wedlock, the interviewers would have raced to the young lady's aide with nothing negative to say or question her about.
Let us keep young Ms. Lydia Playfoot in prayer for her courage to stand up for Chastity in what is, and always has been, true Christian belief and devotion.


How To Love Your Family

Can I ask you a question? Actually two. The first question I wish to ask you is, "Do you think these things are true?" I mean, "The life of Christ as we know it to be through the words of the gospels in the Bible?" ... If your answer to the first question is "yes", then the second question I wish to ask you is, "Do you love Jesus?" - I mean, do you "really" love Jesus?

You see, if we love Jesus, and "really" love Him, then perhaps it is of great importance that we also love His "family".

Yes, I know, this "loving-the-family-of-Christ" can mean many things, and can be acted out on many levels. A few of which are:

(1) Loving the saints, brothers and sisters in the Lord who have gone on before us.

(2) Loving fellow believers, ... men, women and children, who are with us now on this earth at this time.

(3) Loving the family that Christ was born into when He was birthed in the flesh as an infant in Bethlehem.

It is to number "3" I wish to respond at this moment.

Yes, it is true the men and women in these videos only depict events as they believe them to have been at the time of Christ. Yet, there are many truths in the acting of these events by these dear people which are valid. That are personally true historically, because Christ, very God, took on flesh, and like us, dwelt among the human race in human form.

My point is this, "Catholic Psychology" that is particularly relevant for personal application in our modern day, is "To love Christ, the Trinity, and His Church through also loving the family within which Christ Himself was born into in the event of his initial infancy upon earth. I’m referring to our opportunity to discover a very real joyous relationship within the sacred emotional bond that existed and continues to exist between Jesus and His mother Mary.

Great passion was involved in these events for the sake of our salvation. And certainly, Jesus loved his mother, and she loved Him. There can be great healing and growth for you, the more you make real in your life, closeness in the family that included Jesus and His mother Mary. Feel yourself in that family. Share in that family. The beauty, the sacred. The easiness, joy and difficulties. The passion and the glory. ... Cry with them, and laugh with them. See what they see. Feel what they feel and grow by it. ... It is then when we find more to give to our families who are with us now on this earth.

Knowing since ancient times how the words "brother/sister" were culturally interchangeable with "cousins", and that Mary was loved by Jesus in ways that are commonly honorable between a son and his mother, view the following as an invitation for each of us to join intimately with that sacred family, Jesus and Mary, and personally apply that familial relationship to the desires of our hearts, as well as to the personal needs of others in our daily lives. (Together let’s say, "Jesus and Mary, our Lord and our Mother, we love you, and together we will share with you the sacred story of your most holy passion!!!")

"Then one said to Him, ‘Look, your mother and your brothers are standing outside, seeking to speak with You.’ But He answered and said to the one who told Him, ‘Who is My mother and who are My brothers?’ And He stretched out His hand toward His disciples and said, ‘Here are My mother and My brothers! For whoever does the will of My Father in heaven is My brother and sister and mother."
(Matthew 12:47-50)


Events Greater Than Our Own

It helps us to remember that there are events happening in the universe far greater than the casual activities of our ordinary daily lives. Actually, there is a war raging all around us. A war that is fought between spiritual forces far greater than our human intellect can now conceive. A Christian Psychology, thus a Catholic psychology, takes into account the entire picture of human existance and history. It places into perspective mankind's petty relational contentions, and views them in the context of all creation.
"For we do not wrestle against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this age, against spiritual hosts of wickedness in the heavenly places." (Ephesians 6:12)
These forces are envious because very God in Christ took on human flesh, thereby welcoming and paving the way for the human race to become God's very family for those who will be His disciples. ... So now Satan, and one third of the angels that he brought down with him with vicious lies and defiance against God, jealously battle to destroy we of flesh who are made in the Creator's image.
This is our psychology, our thinking, our manner of inter-relating in this great war that goes beyond just ourselves:
"For the weapons of our warfare are not carnal (of the flesh) but mighty in God for pulling down strongholds, casting down arguments and every high thing that exalts itself against the knowledge of God, bringing every thought into captivity to the obedience of Christ, " (II Corinthians 10:4-5)


*Internet Pornography ("Out of Control!!!")*

"One hears a lot about how pornography harms women, children, families, and society. And it does victimize these groups, no question about it." ... "Feminist rhetoric aimed at pornography is couched in the language of the ‘victimization of women.’ But what about the victimization of MEN? I rarely hear pornography spoken of in terms of the harm it does to men. There seems to be an underlying assumption that because men enjoy pornography, then it’s not really bad for them. It’s taken for granted that men are just doing what comes naturally, what they’re hardwired for, being the visual, testosterone-driven creatures that they are. I submit that men are not only victimized by pornography, but that they are the primary victims of pornography. Men are the targeted audience for pornography. If you’re a man reading this, you must realize that pornography is aimed at you, at your mind, your soul, and your pocketbook – to the tune of billions of dollars a year." (Aimee Milburn of the highly informative Catholic Blog Historical Christian.)

In her post Aimee Milburn says further: "And men are very susceptible to it. I think we’re all familiar with the reaction of the ordinary, healthy male to the sight of an attractive, half-clad female form: the eyes-wide instant double-take, faster than thought. Men are wired to respond, and they do. ... pornography is carefully filmed, airbrushed, glossed, manipulated in every way precisely to get the man hooked, so he keeps coming back for more, keeps on feeding the giant sucking hole of hell that pornography is – feeding it not just with money, but with the priceless currency of the eternal agony of souls, the real wealth of hell. ..."

"Pornography is a giant dragnet for hell. A man hooked on pornography not only becomes a slave of hell himself, he becomes a pimp for hell, feeding the demand for men, women and children to be used in porn, and victimizing them directly when, driven by porn, he acts on his porn-fed fantasies. And then everyone, men, women, children, and society, is victimized by porn."

In her post Aimee also quotes from a pastoral letter written by Bishop Paul S. Loverde of the Catholic Diocese of Arlington, Virginia, entitled "Bought With A Price: (Pornography and the Attack on the Living Temple of God)". In the pastoral letter Bishop Loverde states: "While husbands and wives share equal dignity as persons, they do not share temptations equally - especially the temptations associated with the scourge of pornography. It must be admitted that the use of pornography is largely, although certainly not exclusively, associated with males. If a marriage begins to be damaged by pornography, it will most likely be introduced by the husband."

In the pastoral letter he goes on, "Husbands, be aware that your solemn promise of faithfulness, which is the foundation of the formation of your family, is damaged by any use of pornography. Strive to bring honor to the promise you made at the beginning of your married life. The times where intimacy is difficult are opportunities to practice the sacrificial love of a spouse that only your noble vocation illustrates most perfectly." ... "Seeking comfort in the illusion of pornography will incrementally corrupt your understanding of self, your perception of your beloved wife, and the model you present to your children. It is futile to believe that this secret preoccupation can be contained and isolated from family life. In small ways, the self-centeredness and disrespect of self and others, which lie at the heart of this vice, will become manifest within your relationships with your family."

To conclude this post on "Internet Pornography", here are three minutes of counseling strategy explained by a counselor, George Collins, MA, the founder and director of "Compulsion Solutions" (an outpatient counseling service specifically for the treatment of men who suffer from the results of sexually compulsive behavior).


*How To Love A Woman*

"Complacency is an enemy, easy to recognize in others but difficult to admit in ourselves. It is rarely listed among the major human faults, yet it can hinder us in every form of personal growth. Complacency simply means being sure we're right, taking it for granted that our view couldn't possibly be wrong. It means judging others by what we think is right. It blocks out understanding and kindness, and justifies qualities in ourselves that we wouldn't find tolerable in other people. Smug complacency is often at the root of family dissension. ..."

"Let me not be quite so sure that my thinking is always correct. Let me begin by being a little critical of my iron resolution to have things my way. I will keep my ears and my mind open to the ideas of others, even when they don't square with mine. Then I'll be opening the door to growth. ..."

"My serenity does not depend on my winning every round in my battle with life. It does depend on my acceptance of others on their own terms. God grant me that serenity." ("One Day At A Time In Al-Anon", page 197)

"Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ also loved the church and gave Himself for her, that He might sanctify and cleanse her with the washing of water by the word, that He might present her to Himself a glorious church, not having spot or wrinkle or any such thing, but that she should be holy and without blemish. So husbands ought to love their own wives as their own bodies; he who loves his wife loves himself." (Ephesians 5:25-27)


*Commercializing Of Women*

"There is a way that seems right to a man, but the end there of is the way of death." (Proverbs 16:25)

We are all greatly affected by the way we view women in our homes, our lives and society.

1. Women, used as objects to sale products, if not to sale themselves.

2. Women, made to appear as something they are not.

3. To fulfill fantasies in men. Fantasies women cannot live up to.

4. Women, left wondering what is beauty, not seeing their own beauty.

5. Women, unable to leave their homes for fear of how they look without make-up.

6. Women, when being loved, hate their lovers, for they know they are not being loved for what they truly are, but for what they pretend to be.

7. Women, living in society of fundamental dishonesty, inspired to place fantasy above what is true and real.

8. A society where men are no longer respected, and women are no longer cherished.

9. A society where teenaged girls call boys on their cell phones, and "going-on-a-date" means something different than it once did.

10. A socity where women are promised love, but are used instead, then left to swim in loneliness, despair and resentment.

12. A society where men hate themselves, having no examples to follow for knowing how to be men for their wives and children. Grasping for anything to fill the void of their own shame and guilt.


*Divorce ("Nobody's Home")*

"Better is a little with the fear of the Lord, than great treasures with trouble. Better is a dinner of herbs were love is, than a fatted calf with hatred." (Proverbs 15:16-17)

"Love is patient, love is kind, and is not jealous; love does not brag and is not arrogant, does not act unbecomingly; it does not seek its own, is not provoked, does not take into account a wrong suffered, does not rejoice in unrighteousness, but rejoices with the truth; bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. Love never fails ..." (1 Corinthians 13:4-8[a])


*The Perverting Of Catholic Religious (Part 2)*

There was another psychologist of high acclaim at the time Rogers and Coulson were pumping philosophies of relativism into the minds of a large number of American Catholic nuns and priests. His name was Dr. Abraham Maslow. Coulson said Dr. Maslow warned both of them (He and Rogers) that their problem was their "total confusion with evil". However, the documented research on innate evil by Maslow, a humanist himself, and the father of "Hierarchy Of Needs", was not published in journals until 1979. By then the damage had already be done.

Among other activities, Rogers and Coulson had distributed a teaching tape promulgating that "when people do what they deeply want to do, it isn't immoral." About this Dr. Coulson later stated that it became obvious to both he and Rogers that they had not waited long enough for the results of their pilot testing. "The lesbian nuns' book, for example, hadn't come out yet; and we hadn't gotten the reports of seductions in psychotherapy, which became virtually routine in California."

Regarding the intervention teams of therapists that were intitiated under his direct supervision, that eventually dotted parts of the nation, Coulson replied in an interview, "We had trained people who didn't have Rogers' innate discipline from his own fundamentalist Protestant background, people who thought that being themselves meant unleashing libido." ... "Maslow saw that we failed to understand the reality of evil in human life. When we implied to people that they could trust their impulses, they also understood us to mean that they could trust their evil impulses, that they weren't really evil." ... "But they were really evil."

"We did similar programs for the Jesuits, for the Franciscans, for the Sisters of Providence, Sisters of Charity, and the Mercy Sisters. We did dozens of Catholic religious organizations, because as you recall, in the excitement following Vatican II, everybody wanted to update, everybody wanted to renew; and we offered a way for people to renew, without having to bother to study. We said, we'll help you look within. After all, is not God in your heart? Is it not sufficient to be yourself, and wouldn't that make you a good Catholic? And if it doesn't, then perhaps you shouldn't have been a Catholic in the first place. Well, after a while there weren't many Catholics left."

One example of the negative effect of this "Therapy For Normals" presented as Truth to Catholic Religious, was in the Summer of 1965 when Dr. Rogers and Dr. Coulson did a workshop at a Jesuit University. One young Jesuit, about to be ordained, wrote a letter. Here are the words of that letter in verbatim:

"It seemed like a beautiful birth to a new existence. It was as if so many of the things that I valued in word, were now becoming true for me in fact. It is extremely difficult to describe the experience. I had not known how unaware I was of my deepest feelings, nor how valuable they might be to other people. Only when I began to express what was rising somewhere deep within the center of me, and saw the tears in the eyes of the other group members because I was saying something so true for them, too - only then did I begin to really feel that I was deeply a part of the human race. Never in my life before that group experience, had I experienced me so intently; ..."

Dr. Coulson, again I remind you, the supervisor of the entire Rogerian encounter group program at the time, said later the following in response to this letter by the soon to be ordained Jesuit priest: "The proof of authenticity on the humanistic psychology model is to go against what you were trained to be, to call all of that phoniness, and to say what is deepest within you. What's deepest within you, however, are certain unrequited longings, including sexual longings. ... We provoked an epidemic of sexual misconduct among clergy and therapists."

He went further, "... I'll tell you what Rogers came to see, and he came to see it pretty quickly, because he really loved those women (the nuns of "The Immaculate Heart of Mary"). They were a wonderful order, unconventional in the best sense, for example going around in their old habits playing Mozart for Catholic school kids; and that doesn't exist any more. Rogers came to call it, "this damned thing." I'm going to quote him in a tape that he and I made in '76:" ... (Thus the words of Dr. Carl Rogers himself:) ... "I left there feeling, well, I started this damned thing, and look where it's taking us; I don't even know where it's taking me. I don't have any idea what's going to happen next. And I woke up the next morning feeling so depressed, that I could hardly stand it. And then I realized what was wrong." ... "did I start something that is in some fundamental way mistaken, and will lead us off into paths that we will regret?"

Regarding more history in the movement of relative psychology into American leadership of the Catholic Church, Dr. Coulson stated: "Well, actually we started with the Jesuits before we started with the nuns. We did our first Jesuit workshop in '65. Rogers got two honorary doctorates from Jesuit universities. They thought we were saviors." ... "I don't know whether you remember, but in '67 the Jesuits had a big conference at Santa Clara, and there was a lot of talk about the"Third Way" among the Jesuits." ... "The first two ways are faithful marriage and faithful celibacy. But now there was this more humane way, a more human way - all too human as I see it today. The idea was that priests could date. One priest, for example, defined his celibacy for me as, "It means I don't have to marry the girl." (This was not a Jesuit priest. Dr. Coulson believed that at least the Jesuits could rebound from the teaching of relativism, because at list their history was immersed in strong Catholic tradition.) ... [Note: A "Father Becker" wrote a book on "the collapse of Jesuit training" between 1965 and 1975, documenting what he referred to as influences of Rogerian teaching.]

To conclude this post on "The Perverting of Catholic Religious", read the following two excepts as short recent examples of where the aforementioned Rogerian humanist relativism has taken some IHM's:

From "Turning Chapters" ... "The IHM Sisters began in 1845 steeped in Christianity within the Catholic Church. Now, we know we are rooted also in a much older story - that of the universe itself. Integrating the older universe story into our familiar IHM history and faith will play an important part of our next six years. Using the UN Earth Charter as a resource will inform our conversations, decisions and actions."

From "The Universe Story" ... "the universe story reveals that we carry within us the very energy that fashioned the stars, that we are related to all creation, that our ancestry is a family tree inclusive of all life forms, a family much larger than we have ever imagined possible." ... "We know now what was unknown to all the preceding caravan of generations: that we are only fellow voyagers with other creatures in the odyssey of evolution. This new knowledge should have given us, by this time, a sense of kinship with fellow creatures; a wish to live and let live..." ... "The IHM Sisters and many religious have begun to study the universe story through the lens of the Gospel." ... "The Body of Christ, rather than simply being a group of like-minded human beings, includes all of life" ... "The revelation in and through Jesus was not intended to be an end in itself, but instead was meant to usher in a new age of connectedness that Jesus called the "Kingdom of God," ... "This reign of God would unfold as the human species embraced a new way of living. The keeping of the memory and mission of Jesus is not about making him the object of our worship, but about making ourselves the locus of the reign of God."

All I will say now as the writer of this post, when I was a child, I attended a traditional Catholic school." The nuns there were Godly and they did me good. The above quotes "do not" represent those nuns, neither the Catholic Church governed by the Vatican in worship of Christ as He revealed Himself! ... I understand not all nuns of the Church, not even all IHM's, believe what is quoted above. However, I say for the increasing numbers of Religious who believe this is our mission, those who promote this gross distortion of our Lord's very words, they truly do not represent, nor do they deserve the title, the "Immaculate Heart of Mary"!



*The Perverting Of Catholic Religious (Part 1)*

The year was 1966. Psychologists Dr. Carl Rogers and Dr. William Coulson requested to conduct a "pilot study" of a new emerging therapy with nuns of the order of the "Immaculate Heart of Mary". The nunship, desiring to do a good deed, agreed to allow their schools to be the first to experience Dr. Rogers' "Therapy For Normals" (TFN).

Dr. Rogers and Dr. Coulson arrived at the initial "testing-of-nuns-to-improve-them" location to begin their therapeutic intervention, well funded from the "National Institutes of MentalHealth". Eventually they brought with them a total of 58 additional psychological testers and group facilitators. Dr. Coulson himself described years later in his own words, "We inundated that system with humanistic psychology." ... "They agreed to let us come into their schools and work with their normal faculty, and with their normal students, and influence the development of normal Catholic life."

The large team of well funded Rogerian psychologists, under the inventor and master of Rogerianism himself, Dr. Carl Rogers (shown on the right), began their TFN intervention with certain enthusiasm. What did Dr. William Coulson later conclude regarding the work of the psychological teams he personally supervised? ... He said, "It was a disaster!"

In a personal well documented interview he stated regarding the "Immaculate Heart Of Mary" order of nuns, "The IHM's had some 60 schools when we started; at the end, they had "one". There were some 615 nuns when we began. Within a year after our first interventions, 300 of them were petitioning Rome to get out of their vows. They did not want to be under anyone's authority, except the authority of their imperial inner selves."

In the summer of 1966 a "Sister Mary Benjamin, IHM" got involved with the Rogerian therapists. Dr. Coulson explained later in a book written by him, that Sister Mary Benjamin "... became the victim of a lesbian seduction. An older nun in the group, ‘freeing herself to be more expressive of who she really was internally,' decided that she wanted to make love with Sister Mary Benjamin. Well, Sister Mary Benjamin engaged in this; and then she was stricken with guilt, and wondered, to quote from her (own) book, ‘Was I doing something wrong, was I doing something terrible? I talked to a priest.' (Dr. Coulson interjects: "Unfortunately we spoke to the priest first!") ... ‘I talked to a priest,' she says, ‘who refused to pass judgment on my actions. He said it was up to me to decide if they were right or wrong. He opened a door, and I walked through the door, realizing I was on my own.'"

So how exactly did all this get started in the Catholic Church of America, the "destruction of tradition, break from the Vatican, defying original vows made by nuns?" ... Dr. Coulson goes on. ... "As I said, the IHM's were pretty progressive, but some of the leadership was a little bit nervous about the secular psychologist from LaJolla coming in, so I met with the whole community, some 600 nuns gathered in the Immaculate Heart High School gymnasium, in Hollywood, on an April day in 1967. ‘We've already done the pilot study.' we told them, ‘Now we want to get everybody in the system involved in no directive self-exploration. We call it encounter groups, but if that name doesn't please you, we'll call it something else. We'll call it the "person group".' So they went along with us, and that is partly my responsibility, because they thought, ‘These people wouldn't hurt us; the project coordinator is a Catholic. ..."

"Rogers, however, was the principal investigator. He was the brains behind the project, and he was probably anti-Catholic; at the time I didn't recognize it because I probably was, too. We both had a bias against hierarchy. I was flush with Vatican II, and I thought, ‘I am the Church, I am as Catholic as the Pope. Didn't Pope John XIII want us to open the windows and let in the fresh air? Here we come!' And we did, and within a year those nuns wanted out of their vows."

But once the 600 nuns were broken down into "encounter groups" (to make them better nuns, you know, ... psychologically) precisely how long did it take for most of those dedicated nuns to turn their backs on everything they previously held sacred? The project coordinator himself went further:

"Well, in the summer of 1967 the IHM's were having their chapter. They had been
called, as religious orders were, to re-evaluate their mode of living, and to bring it more in line with the charisms of their founder. So they were ready for us. They were ready for an intensive look at themselves with the help of humanistic psychologists. We overcame their traditions, we overcame their faith. ..."

In this same interview Dr. Coulson explained that there was a Father Elwood "Bud" Kaiser in the vicinity of this psychological implosion. He was a Paulist priest, who also wrote a book, it was called "Hollywood". In one of the chapters of that book the priest describes a "romantic involvement" he had with one of the IHM nuns afterwards. He explained in writing regarding the nun that "... she got in the spirit of Rogerian non-directive encounter," and "she propositioned him sexually." Further explanation of the event documents that the priest refused her sexual advances, but that "she got sexually involved with her Rogerian therapist."

Dr. Coulson explained further in the interview: "He (the therapist) got her (the nun) involved in sex games, in therapy. Rogers (Dr. Carl Rogers) didn't get people involved in sex games, but he couldn't prevent his followers from doing it, because all he could say was, ‘Well, I don't do that.' Then his followers would say, ‘Well, of course you don't do that, because you grew up in an earlier era; but we do, and its marvelous: you have set us free to be ourselves and not (be) carbon copies of you."

So how many years did it take to destroy the "Immaculate Heart of Mary" order, or at least drastically change it from what sacrificial, traditional devotion it was? And what came of the 615 nuns?

Dr. Coulson: "It took about a year and a half." ... " There might be a couple of dozen left all together, apart from whom, they're gone. The college campus was sold. There is no more "Immaculate Heart College". ... "One mother pulled her daughter out before it closed, saying, ‘Listen, she can lose her faith for free at the state college.' ... Our grant had been for three years, but we called off the study after two, because we were alarmed about the results. We thought we could make the IHM's better than they were, and we destroyed them."

Dr. William (Bill) Coulson went on to lecture, speak on interviews, write articles and a book. He's done whatever he could do to assuage the guilt and shame he felt for having created what he clearly has referred to as the destruction of Catholic Tradition and Sacramental Devotion among many Religious.

Dr. Coulson has a three tape series on the topic of what this post has merely touched on, but even more directly addressing humanistic psychological in both Catholic and Public schools. As you see, to the left the lecture series is entitled "". PSYCHOLOGY IN EDUCATION, FRIEND OR FOE

Please note that more will be said in future posts on this vital topic on CatholicPsychology.Blogspot. This post, "The Perverting Of Catholic Religious", is the first in a series of posts. Part Two will arrive soon.

(Comments, positive or negative, are welcome. If anyone wish to argue from the opposing side of this issue, feel free to do so. Only expect that what I refer to as the true "Catholic Psychology" will be staunchly defended.)


*Early Church Psychology*

So much for getting mad because your toaster stopped working this morning.
Or being "upset" and "holding a grudge" because someone spoke to you in the wrong tone of voice.
The above picture depicts a day when all Christians were Catholics. Just the mere "thought" of the Church dividing into factions in dispute against one another was deplorable and considered "heresy". ... How today we've grown accustomed to divisions and disagreements. Differences of opinion, or "Your-truth-being-your-truth,-and-my-truth-being-my-truth."
And then the world was without "psychology". ... Or was it?
** I beseech you therefore, brethren, by the mercies of God, that you present your bodies a living sacrifice, holy, acceptable to God, which is your reasonable service.
** And do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind, that you may prove what what is that good and acceptable and perfect will of God.
** For I say, through the grace given to me, to everyone who is among you, not to think of himself more highly than he ought to think, but to think soberly, as God has dealt to each one a measure of faith.
** For as we have many members in one body, but all the members do not have the same function, so we, being many, are one body in Christ, and individually members of one another.
** Having then gifts differing according to the grace that is given to us, let us use them; if prophecy, let us prophesy in proportion to our faith; or ministry, let us use it in our ministering; he who teaches, in teaching; he who exhorts, in exhortation, he who gives, with liberality; he who leads, with diligence; he who shows mercy, with cheerfulness.
** Let love be without hypocrisy. Abhor what is evil. Cling to what is good.
** Be kindly affectionate to one another with brotherly love, in honor giving preference to one another; not lagging in diligence, fervent in spirit, serving the Lord; rejoicing in hope, patient in tribulation, continuing steadfastly in prayer; distributing to the needs of the saints, given to hospitality.
** Bless those who persecute you; bless and do not curse. Rejoice with those who rejoice, and weep with those who weep.
** Be of the same mind toward one another. Do not set your mind on high things, but associate with the humble. Do not be wise in your own opinion.
** Repay no one evil for evil. Have regard for good things in the sight of all men. If it is possible, as much as depends on you, live peaceably with all men.
** Beloved, do not avenge yourselves, but rather give place to wrath; for it is written, "Vengeance is Mine, I will repay," says the Lord.
** Therefore "If your enemy is hungry, feed him; If he is thirsty, give him a drink; For in so doing you will heap coals of fire on his head." (Romans chapter 12)
(Note: The "coals of fire" mentioned in this scripture, refers to a neighbor giving "extra burning coals" to another neighbor who needed a warm fire in his home. The neighbor receiving the coals would then carry the "coals of fire" in a basket safely on his head to his home to start a fire for the benefit of he and his family. ... The illustration meant nothing that was negative or harmful.)


*When Giving Advice Is Difficult!*

Do you see this face? ... I warn you, this is "not" someone you want to "mess" with! ... I'm talking about "Sister Mary Martha". ... A receiver of questions, and giver of advice. ... At the top of her blog ensconced forever are the words: "Life is tough. But Nuns are tougher. If you need helpful advice just "ASK SISTER MARY MARTHA". She'll help you. Just don't expect any sympathy."

Still, mercifully, she admits there are times she doesn't know what to say to peoples' questions. (Admitting that answering to a few sentences can be dangerous.) ... Let's read her own words:
... Suppose you tell me that your brother is a very sweet man but is somewhat neglectful of his wife. You go on to explain that he loves her very much, he is always there for her when it is really important, he's a good bread winner, a good provider. He just misses a birthday sometimes or shows up really late for family gatherings and his wife is embarrassed and it causes them to fight.
What do I say? I would say, keep your trap shut and say a rosary in his behalf and thank the Good Lord that they are more happy than not, that he is there where he really needs to be, that he loves her and that maybe she is being a little needy. If I had to talk with his wife, if she told me about all the things she needs from him, I might say, "Drop some needs."
But you've neglected to tell me, in your question, that the reason your brother is late is because he is being detained by the police, that his nickname is "Sonny"(always a red flag) and that his good behavior always coincides with the periods in which he is on the wagon.
Now my advice is really, "really" bad.
That's why I can't touch this. (Then she shows a letter!):
"I've been in a rocky relationship for over half a year now. Lately I've been wondering what it is I am supposed to do. Do I stay and stick it out even though I am suffering right now because God wants us to persevere through the dark times for what is important to us? Or is the fact that I'm so unhappy lately a definite sign that I'm not on God's path for me? Nothing at all seemed odd to me but then I tell my best friend about my dilemma and she looks at me like I'm nuts to think about it that way. So I started wondering if God really does work that way. Does He have a specific plan for each of us? Or just some of us? Or is it more general like 'do good, be good, love God'? Is He really concerned about my love life? Or just the condition of my immortal soul as in I can date whoever I please so long as there is no sinning? I'd like to hear your thoughts on the matter, Sister. I feel sort of ignorant at the moment. Thanks."
Unhappy for the entire year and a half, or just the last six months or just last couple of weeks? Unhappy because he makes you feel unsafe and unloved?
He makes you feel unsafe. Because he's been known to fly into a rage? Or because he's never on time to pick you up from work?
He makes you feel unloved. Because he is cold and dismissive? Or because he forgot to get you a birthday card?
Or unhappy because he doesn't do what you think he should do? ....... He can't hold down a job? Or he doesn't pick up his socks?
Is his nickname, "Sonny"?
My question is: Why ask me? You should be telling "him" this stuff.
But what do I know? I'm a nun. Jesus doesn't even "wear" socks, so that's never an issue. ...
....... I understand that this is a very "real" and a very "important" problem. I just what to explain as fully as I can why it would be "BAD" for me to try to give you dating advice. You can see how this could really go right off the rails. I could be doing you "serious harm".
As for God's plan. .... He "does" have a plan and He does care about "every aspect of your life". Unfortunately, He doesn't mail you a copy of the plan. But that's why we have the Catholic Church! So you and God can be as close as possible.
And His nickname isn't "Sonny".

Book of Proverbs

(Psychological Scripture Verses:)

" To know wisdom and instruction. to perceive the words of understanding, to receive the instruction of wisdom, justice, judgment, and equity; to give prudence to the simple, to the young man knowledge and discretion - a wise man will hear and increase learning, and a man of under-standing will attain wise counsel, to understand a proverb and an enigma, the words of the wise and their riddles. The fear of the Lord is the beginning of knowledge, but fools despise wisdom and instruction." (1:2-7)

"My son, hear the instruction of your father, and do not forsake the law of your mother; for they will be a graceful ornament on your head, and chains about your neck." (1:8-9)

" For the Lord gives wisdom; from His mouth come knowledge and understanding; He stores up sound wisdom for the upright; He is a shield to those who walk uprightly; He guards the paths of justice, and preserves the way of His saints. Then you will understand righteousness and justice, equity and every good path. When wisdom enters your heart, and knowledge is pleasant to your soul, discretion will preserve you; understanding will keep you." (2:6-11)

"Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge Him, and He shall direct your paths." (3:5-6)

"Do not be wise in your own eyes; fear the Lord and depart from evil. It will be health to your flesh, and strength to your bones."

"Happy is the man who finds wisdom, and the man who gains understanding; for her proceeds are better than the profits of silver, and her gain than fine gold. She is more precious than rubies, and all the things you may desire cannot compare with her. Length of days is in her right hand, in her left hand riches and honor. Her ways are ways of pleasantness, and all her paths are peace. She is a tree of life to those who take hold of her, and happy are all who retain her." (3:13-18)

"When you lie down, you will not be afraid; yes, you will lie down and your sleep will be sweet. Do not be afraid of sudden terror. Nor of trouble from the wicked when it comes; for the Lord will be your confidence, and will keep your foot from being caught." (3:24-26)

"Do not envy the oppressor, and choose none of his ways; for the perverse person is an abomination to the Lord, but His secret counsel is with the upright." (3:31-32)

"Keep your heqrt with all diligence, for out of it spring the issues of life." (4:23)

"For the lips of an immoral woman drip honey, and her mouth is smoother than oil; but in the end she is bitter as wormwood, sharp as a two-edged sword." (5:3-4)

"Drink water from your own cistern, and running water from your own well. Should your fountains be sispersed abroad, streams of water in the streets? Let them be only your own, and not for strangers with you. Let your fountain be blessed, and rejoice with the wife of your youth. As a loving deer and a graceful doe, let her breasts satisfy you at all times; and always be enraptured with her love." (5:15-19)

"These six things the Lord hates, yes, seven are an abomination to Him: A proud look, a lying tongue, hands that shed innocent blood, a heart that devises wicked plans, feet that are swift in running to evil, a false witness who speaks lies, and one who sows discord among brethren." (6:16-19)

"Reproofs of instruction are the way of life. To keep you from the evil woman, from the flattering tongue of a seductress. Do not lust after her beauty in your heart, nor let her allure you with her eyelids. For by means of a harlot a man is reduced to a crust of bread; and an adulteress will prey upon his precious life." (6:23[b]-26)

"Can a man take fire to his bosom, and his clothes not be burned? Can one walk on hot coals, and his feet not be seared? So is he who goes in to his neighbor's wife; whoever touches her shall not be innocent." (6:27-29)

"Whoever commits adultery with a woman lacks understanding; he who does so destroys his own soul. Wounds and dishonor he will get, and his reproach will not be wiped away." (6:32-33) "Do not let your heart turn aside to her ways, do not stray into her paths; for she has cast down many wounded, and all who were slain by her were strong men." (7:25-26)

"I, wisdom, dwell with prudence, and find out knowledge and discretion. The fear of the Lord is to hate evil; pride and arrogance and the evil way and the perverse mouth I hate. Counsel is mine, and sound wisdom; I am understanding, I have strength." (8:12-14) "... he who sins against me wrongs his own soul; all those who hate me love death." (8:36)

"He who corrects a scoffer gets shame for himself, and he who rebukes a wicked man only harms himself. Do not correct a scoffer, lest he hate you; rebuke a wise man, and he will love you. Give instruction to a wise man, and he will be still wiser; teach a just man, and he will increase in learning." (9:7-9)

"If you are wise, you are wise for yourself, and if you scoff, you will bear it alone." (9:12)

"A wise son makes a glad father, but a foolish son is the rief of his mother." (10:1)

"Hatred stirs up strife, but love covers all sins." (10:12)

"In the multitude of words sin is not lacking, but he who restrains his lips is wise." (10:19)

"He who is devoid of wisdom despises his neighbor, but a man of understanding holds his peace." (11:12)

"Where there is no counsel, the people perish; but in the multitude of counselors there is safety." (11:14)

"The merciful man does good for his own soul, but he who is cruel troubles his own flesh." (11:17)

"As a ring of gold in a swine's snout, so is a lovely woman who lacks discretion." (11:22)

"An excellent wife is the crown of her husband, but she who causes shame is like rottenness in his bones." (12:4)

"The thoughts of the righteous are right, but the counsels of the wicked are deceitful." (12:5)

"A righteous man regards the life of his animal, but the tender mercies of the wicked are cruel." (12:10)

"The wicked is ensnared by the transgression of his lips, but the righteous will come through trouble. A man will be satisfied with good by the fruit of his mouth." (12:13-14)

"The way of a fool is right in his own eyes, but he who heeds counsel is wise. A fool's wrath is known at once, but a prudent man covers shame." (12:16)

"... There is one who speaks like the piercings of a sword, but the tongue of the wise promotes health." (12:17[b]-18)

"The truthful lip shall be established forever, but a lying tongue is but for a moment." (12:19)

"Deceit is in the heart of those who devise evil, but counselors of peace have joy." (12:20)

"Lying lips are an abomination to the Lord, but those who deal truthfully are His delight." (12:22)

"Anxiety in the heart of man causes depression, but a good word makes it glad." (12:25)

"The righteous should choose his friends carefully, for the way of the wicked leads them astray." (12:26)

"He who guards his mouth preserves his life, but he who opens wide his lips shall have destruction." (13:3)

"There is one who makes himself rich, yet has nothing; and one who makes himself poor, yet has great riches." (13:7)

"By pride comes nothing but strife, but with the well-advised is wisdom." (13:10)

"Poverty and shame will come to him who disdains correction, but he who regards a rebuke will be honored." (13:18)

"He who walks with wise men will be wise, but the companion of fools will be destroyed." (13:20)

"He who spares his rod hates his son, but he who loves him disciplines him promptly." (13:24)

"The wise woman builds her house, but the foolish pulls it down with her hands." (14:1)

"Go from the presence of a foolish man, when you do not perceive in him the lips of knowledge." (14:7)

"There is a way that seems right to a man, but its end is the way of death." (14:12)

"A quick-tempered man acts foolishly, ..." (14:17[a])

"In the fear of the Lord there is strong confidence, and His children will have a place of refuge." (14:26)

"He who is slow to wrath has great understanding, but he who is impulsive exalts folly." (14:29)

"A soft answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger. The tongue of the wise uses knowledge rightly, but the mouth of fools pours forth foolishness." (15:1-2)

"A wholesome tongue is a tree of life, but perverseness in it breaks the spirit." (15:4)

"Better is a little with the fear of the Lord, than great treasure with trouble. Better is a dinner of herbs where love is, than a fatted calf with hatred." (15:16-17)

"A wrathful man stirs up strife, but he who is slow to anger allays contention." (15:18)

"A wise son makes a father glad, but a foolish man despises his mother." (15:20)

"Without counsel, plans go awry, but in the multitude of counselors they are established." (15:22)

"The light of the eyes rejoices the heart, and a good report makes the bones healthy." (15:30)

"The fear of the Lord is the instruction of wisdom, and before honor is humility." (15:33)

"All the ways of a man are pure in his own eyes, but the Lord weighs the spirits." (16:2)

"Commit your works to the Lord, and your thoughts will be established." (16:3)

"When a man's ways please the Lord, He makes even his enemies to be at peace with him." (16:7)

"Pride goes before destruction, and a haughty spirit befor a fall." (16:18)

"Pleasant words are like a honeycomb, sweetness to the soul and health to the bones." (16:24)

"A perverse man sows strife, and a whisperer separates the best of friends. A violent man entices his neighbor, and leads him in a way that is not good, he winks his eye to devise perverse things; he purses his lips and brings about evil." (16:27-30)

"He who is slow to anger is better than the mighty, and he who rules his spirit than he who takes a city." (16:32)

"Better is a dry morsel with quietness, than a house full of feasting with strife." (17:1)

"The refining pot is for silver and the furnce for gold, but the Lord tests the hearts." (17:3)

"He who covers a transgression seeks love, but he who repeats a matter separates friends." (17:9)

"Let a man meet a bear robbed of her cubs, rather than a fool in his folly." (17:12)

"The beginning of strife is like releasing water; therefore stop contention before a quarrel starts." (17:14)

"A friend loves at all times, and a brother is born for adversity." (17:17)

"A merry heart does good, like medicine, but a broken spirit dries the bones." (17:22)

"A foolish son is a grief to his father, and bitterness to her who bore him." (17:25)

"He who has knowledge spares his words, and a man of understanding is of a calm spirit. Even a fool is counted wise when he holds his peace; when he shuts his lips, he is considered perceptive." (17:27-28)

"It is not good to show partiality to the wicked, or to overthrow the righteous in judgment." (18:5)

"A fool's mouth is his destruction, and his lips are the snare of his soul." (18:7)

"The words of a talebearer are like tasty trifles, and they go down into the inmost body."" (18:8)

"He who answers a matter before he hears it, it is folly and shame to him." (18:13)

"The spirit of man will sustain him in sickness. ..." (18:14[a])

"The first one to plead his cause seems right, until his neighbor comes and examines him." (18:17)

"A brother offended is harder to win than a strong city, and contentions are like the bars of a castle." (18:19)

"Death and life are in the power of the tongue." (18:21[a])

"He who finds a wife finds a good thing, and obtains favor from the Lord." (18:22)

"A man who has friends must himself be friendly, but there is a friend who sticks closer than a brother. (18:24)

"He who gets wisdom loves his own soul; he who keeps understanding will find good." (19:8)

"The discretion of a man makes him slow to anger, and his glory is to overlook a transgression." (19:11)

"A foolish son is the ruin of his father, and the contentions of a wife are a continual dripping." (19:13)

"Houses and riches are an inheritance from fathers, but a prudent wife is from the Lord." (19:14)

"Chasten your son while there is hope, and do not set your heart on his destruction." (19:18)

"A man of great wrath will suffer punishment; for if you rescue him, you will have to do it again." (19:19)

"Listen to counsel and receive instruction, that you may be wise in your latter days." (19:20)

"There are many plans in a man's heart, nevertheless the Lord's counsel - that will stand." (19:21)

"What is desired in a man is kindness." (19:22[a])

"He who mistreats his father and chases away his mother is a son who causes shame and brings reproach." (19:26)

"Wine is a mocker, strong drink is a brawler, and whoever is led astray by it is not wise." (20:1)

"It is honorable for a man to stop striving, since any fool can start a quarel." (20:3)

"Counsel in the heart of man is like deep water, but a man of understanding will draw it out." (20:5)

"Most men will proclaim each his own goodness, but who can find a faithful man?" (20:6)

"Who can say, 'I have made my heart clean, I am pure from my sin'"? (20:9)

"There is gold and a multitude of rubies, but the lips of knowledge are a precious jewel." (20:15)

"Bread gained by deceit is sweet to a man, but afterward his mouth will be filled with gravel." (20:17)

"He who goes about as a talebearer reveals secrets; therefore do not associate with one who flatters with his lips." (20:20)

"Whoever curses his father or his mother, his lamp will be put out in deep darkness." (20:20)

"An inheritance gained hastily at the beginning will not be blessed at the end." (20:21)

"Do not say, "I will recompense evil"; wait for the Lord, and He will save you." (20:22)

"A man's steps are of the Lord; how then can a man understand his own way?" (20:24)

"It is a snare for a man to devote rashly something as holy, and afterward to reconsider his vows." (20:25)

"The spirit of a man is the lamp of the Lord, searching all the inner depths of his heart." (20:27)

"The glory of young men is their strength, and the splendor of old men is their gray head." (2029)

"Every way of a man is right in his own eyes, but the Lord weighs the hearts." (21:2)

"Getting treasures by a lying tongue is the fleeting fantasy of those who seek death." (21:6)

"Better to dwell in a corner of a housetop, than in a house shared with a contentious woman." (21:9)

"A gift in secret pacifies anger, and a bribe behind the back strong wrath." (21:14)

"Better to dwell in the wilderness, than with a contentious and angry woman." (21:19)

"Whoever guards his mouth and tongue keeps his soul from troubles." (21:23)

"The horse is prepared for the day of battle, but deliverance is of the Lord." (21:31)

"A good name is to be chosen rather than great riches, loving favor rather than silver and gold." (22:1)

"By humility and the fear of the Lord are riches and honor and life." (22:4)

"Train up a child in the way he should go, and when he is old he will not depart from it." (22:6)

"Cast out the scoffer, and contention will leave; yes, strife and reproach will cease." (22:10)

"Have I not written to you excellent things of counsels and knowledge, that I may make you know the certainty of the words of truth, that you may answer words of truth to those who send to you?" (22:20-21)

"Make no friendship with an angry man, and with a furious man do not go, lest you learn his ways and set a snare for your soul." (22:24-25)

"Do not overwork to be rich; because of your own understanding, cease!" (23:4)

"Do not eat the bread of a miser, nor desire his delicacies; for as he thinks in his heart, so is he. 'Eat and drink!' he says to you, but his heart is not with you. The morsel you have eaten, you will vomit up, and waste your pleasant words." (23:6-8)

"Do not speak in the hearing of a fool, for he will despise the wisdom of your words." (23:9)

"Do not let your heart envy sinners, but be zealous for the fear of the Lord all the day; for surely there is a hereafter, and your hope will not be cut off." (23:17-18)

"Listen to your father who begot you, and do not despise your mother when she is old." (23:22)

"The father of the righteous will greatly rejoice, and he who begets a wise child will delight in him. Let your father and your mother be glad, and let her who bore you rejoice." (23:24-25)

"My son, give me your heart, and let your eyes observe my ways. For a harlot is a deep pit, and a seductress is a narrow well. She also lies in wait as for a victim. And increases the unfaithful among men." (23:26-28)

"Who has woe? Who has sorrow? Who has contentions? Who has complaints? Who has wounds without cause? Who has redness of eyes? Those who linger long at the wine, those who go in search of mixed wine. Do not look on the wine when it is red, when it sparkles in the cup, when it swirls around smoothly; at the last it bites like a serpent, and stings like a viper. Your eyes will see strange things, and your heart will utter perverse things. Yes, you will be like one who lies down in the midst of the sea, or like one who lies at the top of the mast, saying: 'They have struck me, but I was not hurt; they have beaten me, but I did not feel it, when shall I awake, that I may seek another drink?" (23:29-35)

"A wise man is strong, yes, a man of knowledge increases strength; for by wise counsel you will wage your own war, and in a multitude of counselors there is safety." (24:5-6)

"If you faint in the day of adversity, your strength is small." (24:10)

"My son, eat honey because it is good, and the honeycomb which is sweet to your taste; so shall the knowledge of wisdom be to your soul;" (24:13-14[a])

"... a righteous man may fall seven times and rise again, but the wicked shall fall by calamity." (24:16)

"Do not rejoice when your enemy falls, and do not let your heart be glad when he stumbles; lest the Lord see it, and it displease Him, and He turn away His wrath from him." (24:17-18)

"It is not good to show partiality in Judgment." (24:23[b])

"He who gives a right answer kisses the lips." (24:26)

"Do not say, 'I will do to him just as he has done to me; I will render to the man according to his work." (24:29)

"It is the glory of God to conceal a matter." (25:2)

"A word fitly spoken is like apples of gold in settings of silver, like an earring of gold and an ornament of fine gold is a wise rebuker to an obedient ear." (25:11-12)

"A man who bears false witness against his neighbor is like a club, a sword, and a sharp arrow." (25:18)

"Confidence in an unfaithful man in time of trouble is like a bad tooth and a foot out of joint." (25:19)

"It is better to dwell in a corner of a housetop, than a house shared with a contentious woman." (25:24)

"Whoever has no rule over his own spirit is like a city broken down, without walls." (25:28)

"Do not answer a fool according to his folly, lest you also be like him." (26:4)

"Do you see a man wise in his own eyes? There is more hope for a fool than for him." (26:12)

"The lazy man is wiser in his own eyes than seven men who can answer sensibly." (26:16)

"He who passes by and meddles in a quarrel not his own is like one who takes a dog by the ears." (26:17)

"Like a madman who throws firebrands, arrows, and death, is the man who deceives his neighbor, and says, 'I was only joking!'" (26:18-19)

"Where there is no wood, the fire goes out; and where there is no talebearer, strife ceases. As charcoal is to burning coals, and wood to fire, so is a contentious man to kindle strife." (26:20-21)

"He who hates, disguises it with his lips, and lays up deceit within himself; when he speaks kindly, do not believe him, for there are seven abominations in his heart; though his hatred is covered by deceit, his wickedness will be revealed before the assembly." (26:24-26)

"A lying tongue hates those who are crushed by it, and a flattering mouth works ruin." (26:28)

"Let another man praise you, and not your own mouth; a stranger, and not your own lips." (27:2)

"A stone is heavy and sand is weighty, but a fool's wrath is heavier than both of them." (27:3)

"Wrath is cruel and anger is torrent, but who is able to stand before jealousy?" (27:4)

"Open rebuke is better than love carefully concealed." (27:5)

"Faithful are the wounds of a friend, but the kisses of an enemy are deceitful." (27:6)

"Ointment and perfume delight the heart, and the sweetness of a man's friend gives delight by hearty counsel." (27:9)

"He who blesses his friend with a loud voice, rising early in the morning, it will be counted a curse to him." (27:14)

"A continual dripping on a very rainy day and a contentious woman are alike; whoever restrains her restrains the wind, and grasps oil with his right hand." (27:15-16)

"As in water face reflects face, so a man's heart reveals the man." (27:19)

"Though you grind a fool in a mortar with a pestle along with crushed grain, yet his foolishness will not depart from him." (27:22)

"The wicked flee when no one pursues, but the righteous are bold as a lion." (28:1)

"Evil men do not understand justice, but those who seek the Lord understand all." (28:5)

"Better is the poor who walks in his integrity than one perverse in his ways, though he be rich." (28:6)

"Whoever causes the upright to go astrain in an evil way, he himself will fall into his own pit;" (28:10)

"Whoever robs his father or his mother, and says, 'It is no transgression,' the same is companion to a destroyer." (28:24)

"He who is of a proud heart stirs up strife, ..." (28:25[a])

"He who is often rebuked, and hardens his neck, will suddenly be destroyed, and that without remedy." (29:1)

"If a wise man contends with a foolish man, whether the fool rages or laughs, there is no peace." (29:9)

"A fool vents all his feelings, but a wise man holds them back." (29:11)

"The rod and rebuke give wisdom, but a child left to himself brings shame to his mother." (29:15)

"Correct your son, and he will give you rest; yes, he will give delight to your soul." (29:17)

"Do you see a man hasty in his words? There is more hope for a fool than for him." (29:20)

"An angry man stirs up strife, and a furious man abounds in transgression." (29:22)

"The fear of man brings a snare, but whoever trusts in the Lord shall be safe." (29:25)

"There is a generation that curses its father, and does not bless its mother. There is a generation that is pure in its own eyes, yet is not washed from its filthiness." (30:11-12)

"This is the way of an adulterous woman; she eats and wipes her mouth, and says, 'I have done no wickedness.' (30:20)

"If you have been foolish in exalting yourself, or if you have devised evil, put your hand on your mouth. For as the churning of milk produces butter, and wringing the nose produces blood, so the forcing of wrath produces strife." (30:32-33)

"Who can find a virtuous wife? For her worth is far above rubies. The heart of her husband safely trusts her; so he will have no lack of gain. She does him good and not evil all the days of her life." (31:10-12)

"Charm is deceitful and beauty is passing, but a woman who fears the Lord, she shall be praised. Give her of the fruit of her hands, and let her own works praise her in the gates." (31:30-31)