Do you see this face? ... I warn you, this is "not" someone you want to "mess" with! ... I'm talking about "Sister Mary Martha". ... A receiver of questions, and giver of advice. ... At the top of her blog ensconced forever are the words: "Life is tough. But Nuns are tougher. If you need helpful advice just "ASK SISTER MARY MARTHA". She'll help you. Just don't expect any sympathy.".
Still, mercifully, she admits there are times she doesn't know what to say to peoples' questions. (Admitting that answering to a few sentences can be dangerous.) ... Let's read her own words:
.... Suppose you tell me that your brother is a very sweet man but is somewhat neglectful of his wife. You go on to explain that he loves her very much, he is always there for her when it is really important, he's a good bread winner, a good provider. He just misses a birthday sometimes or shows up really late for family gatherings and his wife is embarrassed and it causes them to fight.
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What do I say? I would say, keep your trap shut and say a rosary in his behalf and thank the Good Lord that they are more happy than not, that he is there where he really needs to be, that he loves her and that maybe she is being a little needy. If I had to talk with his wife, if she told me about all the things she needs from him, I might say, "Drop some needs."
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But you've neglected to tell me, in your question, that the reason your brother is late is because he is being detained by the police, that his nickname is "Sonny"(always a red flag) and that his good behavior always coincides with the periods in which he is on the wagon.
Now my advice is really, "really" bad.
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That's why I can't touch this. (Then she shows a letter!):
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"I've been in a rocky relationship for over half a year now. Lately I've been wondering what it is I am supposed to do. Do I stay and stick it out even though I am suffering right now because God wants us to persevere through the dark times for what is important to us? Or is the fact that I'm so unhappy lately a definite sign that I'm not on God's path for me? Nothing at all seemed odd to me but then I tell my best friend about my dilemma and she looks at me like I'm nuts to think about it that way. So I started wondering if God really does work that way. Does He have a specific plan for each of us? Or just some of us? Or is it more general like 'do good, be good, love God'? Is He really concerned about my love life? Or just the condition of my immortal soul as in I can date whoever I please so long as there is no sinning? I'd like to hear your thoughts on the matter, Sister. I feel sort of ignorant at the moment. Thanks."
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Unhappy for the entire year and a half, or just the last six months or just last couple of weeks? Unhappy because he makes you feel unsafe and unloved?
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He makes you feel unsafe. Because he's been known to fly into a rage? Or because he's never on time to pick you up from work?
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He makes you feel unloved. Because he is cold and dismissive? Or because he forgot to get you a birthday card?
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Or unhappy because he doesn't do what you think he should do? ....... He can't hold down a job? Or he doesn't pick up his socks?
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Is his nickname, "Sonny"?
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My question is: Why ask me? You should be telling "him" this stuff.
But what do I know? I'm a nun. Jesus doesn't even "wear" socks, so that's never an issue. ...
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....... I understand that this is a very "real" and a very "important" problem. I just what to explain as fully as I can why it would be "BAD" for me to try to give you dating advice. You can see how this could really go right off the rails. I could be doing you "serious harm".
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As for God's plan. .... He "does" have a plan and He does care about "every aspect of your life". Unfortunately, He doesn't mail you a copy of the plan. But that's why we have the Catholic Church! So you and God can be as close as possible.
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And His nickname isn't "Sonny".
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