** How To Be A Good Counselor (101) **

(***) Good day students. Thanks for arriving on time for your class. ..... (Just kidding. ... Well, sort of.) Now, let's begin our first lesson in the course "How To Be A Good Counselor 101". Are you ready? OK, here we go. Now, listen to this. ... When counseling, pay close attention to what your clients are saying to you.
(***) Of course, we all know to do this, but I recommend you listen carefully to your client (when finally you're a therapist) while confidently figuring out "Who-Dislikes-Who-For-What-Reason-Always" (a future post).
(***) But,, before doing that, maybe you should read what this has to do with marriage, "When You Are Right And Your Spouse Is Wrong" Part 1 and Part 2.
(***) On second thought, before you do that, I think maybe it's a good idea to read "What Has Been Forgotten About Women" (At least women would appreciate you reading that one!)
(***) Oh, and while we're on the subject of "women", (A topic that can be complicated at times for us men!) consult "The Adam And Eve Syndrome (Destruction Of Marital Oneness)".
(***) Yet, now that I think about it, if any of those women we just referred to know you've read "that" post, then the secret is out, and we're in "big-trouble". That being the case, I strongly recommend, urgently, that you immediately (if not sooner) go to "What Does It Mean To Be IN Love," even if you don't read it! (At least "look" like you're reading it.).
(***) ... Oh, know! What's "wrong" with me! "If you 'pretended' at doing anything, I mean "anything", then it's a "fact" your wife knows about it!
(***) Oh, man. This is "not" good! (Women have a "sense" for that kind of thing you know!)
(***) OK. Don't panic. It'll be OK. Trust me. (I've been in your shoes before.) ... Try this. Tell your wife you "promise" you will read Husband-Wife Need for Each other. This will gain you "points" with your wife. Get-you-in-good-standing-with-her, if you knowhat I mean! (Remember, I'm a "professional.) And while you do this, for "goodness sakes"-"swear" to your wife that you "will" read "Why One Woman Is Not Enough For Some Men". ...
(***) Oh no!!! What am I saying??!!! What's gotten into me??? That's "TERRIBLE" advice!!!
(***) (Is your wife in the room, or worse, is she "reading" this?) - I hope not!!! That could be "tragic"!
(***) OK, I'm panicking, but you don't have to. (Not yet anyway.) Stop. - Let me think. ... Yes, I know. If you want out of this mess you've got yourself into, I'm afraid you have no choice but to come clean. What I mean is, get honest with this woman that is your wife!! (I know that's asking a lot, but man,"your back is against a wall here!")
(***) So, listen closely. Follow my directives precisely. Do not deviate, understand? Pay attention to every word I will now tell you, and follow it to a "tee"!!!
(***) Wait a minute. Maybe "this" will work. For better luck, have your wife "watch" you while you read something good that she's actually been trying to tell you for years (only you wouldn't listen). But to be effective, it might be smart that you not tell her that it was "me" who put you up to reading this stuff. ...
(***) You ready? ... Now, read. But smile while you do it, (as you at the same time move your lips as if articulating each sylable dramatically). How to Listen To Your Wife (For Husbands). If you're lucky, your wife will be peering tenderly over your shoulder. Maybe then your wife will notice the post next to that one, How To Make Husbands Better (For Wives).
(***) Oh. Excuse me. No, no, no, no, no...! I can't believe I just said that! We "can't" have women "making-us-men-be-better"! I'm not sure it works that way anyway. ... (Not to mention "my own kind" that I have turned against by saying this!)
(***) OK, try this. If by chance your wife "did" read that post over your shoulder (You know, the one about "fixing us men"), look her square in the face and "lie." (You heard me right, "lie" man. Lie like there's no tomorrow!) Tell this woman you married that it was "you" who thought of passing such a lovely evening, parousing together with her these precious writings on scroll designed to "enhance" your "relationship" with her romantically, - this your beautiful wife! ... You understand? ... Good. ...
(***) Now, on the count of three, while your wife's looking across the at you, move your lips where she can see them. Do so and at least "pretend" with all your might that you're reading "Vital Oneness In Marriage" and "Sex That Is Meaningful". Now if you can do "that", my friend, I guarantee you will capture your wife's attention, get you out of trouble, "and" score points with her at the same time!!! . (Unless I'm mistaken, of course, which I don't believe I am.)
(***) Oh, but one more thing. Do not (and I mean absolutely "do not") send an e-mail to my wife telling her I told you this stuff!!! Understand me? If you "do" tell my wife I said these things, I'll deny every bit of it!!! I mean it!
(***) On second thought, this whole conversation we're having is getting awfully embarrassing!!! ... I tell you what, let's just forget we even met, OK? ...
(***) I know you've got a problem with your wife now, but personally, I claim no responsibility for it. You're on your own Bud. I've got my own problems.
(***) And about the "unfinished business" you stirred up here. As far as I'm concerned, you're on your own! And if by some strange chance you sill have an inkling of desire to aide humankind by being some sort of counselor, my advice to you is "Don't". Forget the whole thing. Get a job fixing computers, being a plumber. Train dogs to "sit" or something. .....
(***) Alright, I tell you what. Just do what you want, OK? Just leave me out of it. Get it? And while you're doing that, maybe it is best we just end this class, this post, this article (whatever it is) right now. ..... However, now that I think about it, judging by the emotional "wrecks" you and I both are now, perhaps before quitting and leaving the classroom to face this confusing world, we should read together calmly One Reason For Feeling Bad, and Having A Humble Opinion Of Oneself. ...
If not, well then let's exit the building in single file.. ... See you soon for our next lesson. (Remember, ... be on time.)

(Jim Hogue has been working in the field of counseling and psychotherapy, on various levels, for a total of 27 years. Having clinically created and assisted in maintaining dual diagnosis drug treatment programs and counseling centers, he has especially applied himself professionally for clients in areas of sexual abuse trauma, marital communication and Parent/Child problem relationships. Jim is a devout Catholic, having returned to the Catholic Church after years as a Protestant minister and missionary. Some say Mr. Hogue is a gifted musician as a vocalist and guitarist, including an exhaustive repertoire of both traditional and contemporary Christian music that he leads in Catholic Church worship and Mass. He believes that much of psychology that is productive for life and personal relationships, already exists remarkably, and always has, in forms of sacraments, traditions, prayers and practices of the Roman Catholic Church. [May God bless all we Christians, both Catholic and Protestant, as we seek to be His servants.]

Other posts on http://www.catholicpsychology.blogspot.com/ at this point include: Catholic Family Systems Theory, ... Healing For Emotional Pain, ... What Catholics Believe About Marriage, ... What Does It Mean To Be "IN LOVE", ... The Psychology Of Love, ... How To Not Be Anxious, ... Husband And Wife, Love And Priority, ... Neuro-Theology And Nuns ... A Mother Ponders Her Blog Addiction ... Catholic Psychology 101, ...and ...Why Do People Criticize (Part 1) and (Part 2). [For feedback, contributions and comments please e-mail: http://www.catholicpsychology@hotmail.com/ .]